a quandry

i wish i didn't have diabetes. that i didn't have to come across as an OCD type person. adding and subtracting and fine tuning numbers and bg and what i ate. wish i could just be casual bout everything. eat this, eat that, work out at this time, sleep in till this time. but i can't. my life is ruled by the clock and my blood sugars.

this poses many problems. im actually wondering whether i can stay in the job where im at. i mean, im on my feet for 8 - 9 hours, cutting meat, serving customers, filling the counter, etc. This is quite physical work and a person needs to consume quite a few carbs to do this job. some of my coworkers will eat an entire McDonald's meal or 12-inch sub. that'll last them about 4 hours.

with carbs such an essential part to this job i wonder if now is the time that i should be considering switching jobs. perhaps a desk job would be a better option? i mean that can come with its problems too: little access to food (incase my bg is low and I need to eat), deadlines to finish projects, power structure, etc.

there is no perfect work place and im a strong believer in "it's what you make of it".

i've said before that i love blue-collar type work: carpentry, landscaping, meat cutting, etc. but when my bg is good i really enjoy sitting, studying, reading, writing too. all those things that i can't seem to concentrate on when my bg is high.

as my bg stabilizes over the next couple of weeks as i work out this new low-carb regime, i wonder if i am still going to be well suited for the job in which i work?

if not i will have to leave as my health is important. i need to give it the credit it deserves. i dont want to go blind, suffer kidney failure, and endure life without my toes/feet/legs.

(diabetics, as a result of poor bg control, often have circulation problems. these problems strike hardest in the feet where circulation requires more effort. if blood vessels are damaged due to high blood sugars the blood does not circulate as well. think of sitting water as opposed to running water. the sitting water that you see on those WorldVision ads. would you rather drink/wash in that or in a running stream? standing/sitting blood, like water, is similar. and when your circulation is weak you can suffer big time infection. gangrene sets in and yeah, its not pretty. thus the reason for the amputations among the diabetic population.)

anyways. i will try my plan out today. if i have to eat carbs i will. i won't be one of those anti-carb fanatics. carbs are good for you. they provide you with energy. carbs are harmful to you when you're body is not using them. if you have a desk job you want a low-carb diet. if you do a lot of exercise/physical activity you want to consume an APPROPRIATE amount of carbohydrates. avg. 150 / person / day. to give you an idea, a banana is 20 CHO, a piece of bread is 15 - 20 CHO.

anyways. thats it for now. take care.